Your child is a diamond. He has talent. He is promising. You concentrate on honing it. Parenting experts say, do not burden any child in your neighborhood with your expectations.
‘Papa says bada naam karega, son humara kam karega karega…’ This song was composed years ago, but now this statement has started applying to the mother more than the father. In earlier times, children were afraid of their father and used to tell everything to their mother, but now the father has become a friend of the children. Although there is nothing wrong in this, one's fear is fine to create discipline in the house. The problem is that the mother wants her child to be an all-rounder today. When a guest comes and there is a small child in the house, the mother immediately asks the child to show his skills, “Son, show uncle a dance or son, make aunty sing a song.”
In earlier times, only studies were given more importance and if the child had any other skill, it was ignored and pressure was created to study. Then the movie 'Three Idiots' came and people understood to some extent that not every child can be good in studies and can make a career in other fields also. This reduced the pressure of studies on the child, but the pressure of expectations remained the same because the dialogue of the film 'Gupta ji kya Kahenge' is still prevalent in society and the issue is also stuck in the same place. 'Their children are doing it, why aren't you doing it?'
In the age of social media, where there is nothing personal left, due to this, there is double pressure on children, because now there are many big platforms to showcase their skills. Small children are becoming very famous and becoming a part of reality shows. There are also many such schools where along with studies, extra activities like swimming, dancing, singing, skating, and horse riding are conducted. Parents also want to enroll their children in such expensive schools as per their capacity, in which they can learn everything. Now there are dance academies and singing studios on every street corner and teachers have started coming to the society to teach karate, taekwondo, and skating, who come to the children's homes and teach them. In such a situation, the child whose school does not have all these activities learns here by paying a separate fee.
Then competing has always been a human habit. As seen in the neighborhood, sometimes a person goes beyond his means to improve his status among the relatives, which impacts the children. The mother works hard with the child, and takes her to different classes so that her child also learns every new thing like other children. If a relative has a child who is famous for singing, then she also starts preparing her child for it, without understanding what is the specialty of her child. He just has to show it to others, because today's world is about 'showing off'. Pressure starts coming on the child from an early age.
Today mothers proudly tell their friends that their 2-3 year old child can use a mobile phone. They have no idea how much ill effects it has and will have. Every day we see in reels and shorts that innocent children are making such reels that are beyond their understanding. It is not being noticed that children's innocence and childhood are being snatched away due to this. When the child is unable to do anything according to the mother's wishes, he has to face the mother's anger again and again and he starts fearing her.
Although many children around us are indeed all-rounders. But every child cannot be looked at with the same expectations. Due to being engaged in different activities, children are not able to spend quality time at home. Many times, it becomes clear that the mother has made her child a show-piece. We have to change our ways, otherwise no one else but ourselves and our children will suffer the consequences.
Know the teacher's opinion also
Gaurav Rathore, a geography teacher at Daily College, Indore, says, I see that mothers are wasting a lot of talent of their children in their efforts to make them all-rounders. We explain that it is okay to do everything, but the focus should be on one thing only, but this is not happening. Due to this, instead of becoming an all-rounder, children start learning every activity little by little, due to which they are not able to learn even one thing properly and instead of being an all-rounder, they become a mess. When a child does not listen to his parents, they come to us and request us to convince the child to agree to participate in every field. Most of the mothers come to the Parent-Teacher Meeting (PTM) and try to show us how aware they are. She tells us what activities her child is involved in after school and how talented he is.
Papa understands, but Mother interrupts.
Prasun, a class 12 student, says, after completing his studies, he wants to take his father's business forward. For this, I also help them in their work from now on and hence I do not want to go to regular college after 12th. But my mother again and again makes me fill some form or the other for a government job. She wants me to prepare for a government job, but I want to do business. I have also convinced my father about this.
(PC: Freepik)
